Happy Wedding Anniversary.
What the Heck Do You Learn in One Year? A Lot, Actually.
When you look back over the course of a year, it’s amazing what you can learn. It’s easy to focus on the big moments, but some of the most impactful lessons come from those small, everyday experiences. As I reflect on what I've learned in the last year, I wanted to share a few key takeaways that I believe can make a meaningful difference in your relationships—whether with a partner, co-workers, family, or even neighbors. Let’s make it quick, but meaningful.
1. Awareness: Your Reactions Are Your Responsibility
How many times have you found yourself thinking, "If only they did this, or didn’t do that, everything would be fine"? It’s easy to place blame on others, but I’ve come to realize that my reactions are entirely on me. Sure, other people’s actions might be frustrating, but the way I respond is my choice. And when stress piles on, it's especially easy to snap. But next time you feel triggered, ask yourself: How do I typically react when I'm stressed out?
Being aware of our responses—especially when we’re not at our best—gives us a sense of control. Instead of letting circumstances dictate our emotions, we can take a step back, breathe, and choose a better response.
2. Speak Up: Communicate, and Clearly
It might seem obvious, but it’s so easy to let stress fester when we don’t communicate. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, talk about it. Whether it’s about work, your relationship, or personal life—be specific about what is stressing you out. It’s one thing to say, “I’m stressed,” but it’s far more helpful to say, “I’m stressed because I feel like I’m doing all the housework and I need some help.” The more direct and clear you are, the better others can understand and support you.
3. Celebrate: Acknowledge the Small Wins
In the rush of life, it’s easy to overlook the small moments that matter. Did you get through a difficult meeting at work? Celebrate it. Did your partner remember to take out the trash without being asked? Acknowledge that! Life is made of these little wins, and celebrating them not only boosts morale but also strengthens connections with others.
Take the time every day to find something, no matter how small, to celebrate. These moments of acknowledgment create a positive, uplifting energy that carries you through tougher days.
4. Starts With You: Love Yourself First
If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that a successful, happy, and loving relationship begins with yourself. If you don't feel good about yourself—whether in terms of your self-worth, capabilities, or love—it’s hard to give that love to others. I’ve heard the saying, “You can’t pour from an empty teacup,” and it rings true. If you’re not taking care of your own mental, emotional, and physical well-being, it’s almost impossible to show up fully for others.
When you love yourself, support yourself, and believe in yourself, you can be a better partner, friend, co-worker, and family member. You teach others how to treat you by how you treat yourself.
Today’s Challenge: Quick Check-In for Any Relationship
These lessons apply to any relationship, whether personal or professional. So, here’s a challenge for today: take 1-5 minutes for yourself and ask the following questions. It’s a small investment of time for a big impact:
What makes me defensive?
Understanding the root of your defensiveness can help you address it calmly next time.What makes me stressed out?
Are there common triggers that you can manage or avoid? Knowing what stresses you gives you a chance to prepare for it.What is ONE thing I can celebrate or acknowledge today?
Whether it’s a personal win or something positive in your relationships, take a moment to honor it.
You might be surprised at how these simple questions can help you build better relationships—starting with the most important one: the relationship you have with yourself.
Wrap-Up:
The lessons from this year have been invaluable, and I hope these reflections inspire you to take charge of your own emotional well-being and relationships. We all deserve love, joy, and growth, and it starts with awareness, clear communication, and a whole lot of self-love.
